Aulds at work

Pardon my weird blog entry titles, it's one of the things I like thinking about before I publish my entries. If you're wondering what the hell 'Aulds' is, it's actually 'old Auds' I just thought O and AU sound kind of the same. And no, it's not a typo, it's deliberate. Anyway, 'Aulds' annoying as it may be, just bear with me, means old Auds, which brings us to this blog entry. Why old Auds? I have a feeling this will be a long entry, but let's just see. 


The old Auds defined is simply the Auds in the past, it may include the few minutes, seconds or even milliseconds that transpires as I type this blog entry and may stretch out to the very first mark of my existence. That folks, is subjective, it's up to you to interpret whether I started existing when I was still a zygote or when I was conceived, whatever you get my point (I hope). Anyway, part of the old Auds included a trait that I thought improved over the course of a few years during my studies as an undergraduate.l I really thought that I've changed and for the better too but March 28 proved me wrong. So very wrong.


I thought I've learned how to present myself to people I am not acquainted with in a relaxed, I'm-not-so-painfully-shy-I-can-talk-to-you-and-ask-you-about-yourself-and-get-to-know-you-in-the-process kind of way. Of course I know that I have not reached that point where I can talk to people (strangers) so casually even though I've only known them for minutes or hours but I really thought I could be more vocal and be more friendly compared to the old me, who would, in case of meeting new people and being put in a new social circle, not talk at all and be mistaken to be so quiet to the point of hard-to-determine-whether-she's-mute-or-not.


People's first impression of me is usually 'the quiet girl', sometimes to the point of being mataray or in Richmond's case pipi. When I'm quiet, people assume I'm a serious person, one who doesn't know how to joke around, be lax and chill. My poker face doesn't help as well because some people would assume I'm too snobby to talk to. Sometimes people assume I'm snobby but I really am nooot. Maybe there are times that I am but most of the time people think I am and it's because I don't acquaint with them or greet them even though we've been introduced. It's me being so painfully shy I can't greet you, not me thinking I'm above you and greeting you would be a waste of time. If you've ever encountered that moment with me, where you and I are introduced, we meet somewhere and I don't acknowledge you're there, let me just tell you that I would've been at that time probably thinking if I'd be greeting you or not and thinking about how to greet you. If ever I don't muster enough courage to do that then that whole scenario would play in my head over and over again thinking about the possible outcomes of me being able to greet you.


Anyway, first two weeks of work has been exactly like that. People actually told me to talk. HAHA. That's how quiet I was, whenever we'd eat lunch, I'd feel so awkward I'd focus on eating my food. I would smile to people who were familiar to me but sometimes I secretly don't know their names. :)) I would only talk to respond to people asking me questions and I would not ask follow up questions about them which I think is courtesy. How rude of me. O_O It's me being inhibited by my shy nature. And I am surprised why my friends don't think I'm shy when clearly I am. SHY is an understatement. 


Although I've been like that for the past two weeks, I've shown improvement these past two days. I'm not as shy as I was two weeks ago maybe throwing in the fact that I've moved from a semi-isolated place to where my team is located so now I get to talk to people. I am still shy but at least I talk. I also get to answer the phone which at first scared me but it turns out simpler than what I expected answering the office phone would be. :)) Although the one ring policy is kind of nerve wracking, I just have to be alert at all times. (They track that so I really have to be alert) So far work is good, although I was an eager beaver for the past two weeks, I think I still appreciate work as of the moment. HAHA. Let's just see, I think the project will need me to work OT in the coming months or weeks, I don't know really! 


I really like how people have lots of breaks there. :> Favorite times of the day = break times. 


Disclaimer: Please don't call me 'Aulds' I know you're tempted BUT control yourself, conquer and overcome temptation, it's for your own good. :)