Headache and the sorts

Argh, I don't really know how to explain what I'm feeling right now. I'm feeling sluggish and my head hurts. It's not as sharp as migraines or head aches but it hurts. I hate this feeling, I hate the feeling of not knowing what to do next. GRR. I just want it to stop and I wanna quit but I can't. Argh. I can't. 

I can't rest it off because I wouldn't want to go back feeling the way I feel now. Even listening to music doesn't help. I can't rest and relax for a while then go back because all that relaxation and resting won't amount to anything of help to me programming what I need to program. 

Maybe I just need a quick nap. But my naps are never quick. My head hurts thinking about all this. Ugh.

Maybe it's me being pressured right now again. Hate pressure. Makes me just want to quit. 

I hate this week. It's pressure week and ironically I'm more pressured this week than last week (training). It just makes me want to go away, quit, leave everything and hope everything will work out just fine. 

I don't want to deliver something incomplete and inadequate, what's the point of me developing the program if it's not going to be of help in the end anyway? Di ko na alam, di ko na talaga alam. Ano ba ang kailangan kong gawin? Mahirap pilitin ang sarili gawin ang isang bagay na hindi naman gustong gawin. This isn't just one of my blog entries where I rant about things when I'm under pressure, feeling frustrated or just simply filled with angst. This is about my future. Will I be able to survive the industry if I were to work as a programmer. Ngayon palang suko nako, pano pa kaya kung naging developer nga ako. Damn woman! 

Can't take this frickin' pressure right now! Calgone TAKE ME AWAY. Kaloka.